Limiting beliefs

What do you believe about your past? What do you believe about your job?

A belief is a thought you’ve had so many times that it feels true. Like ruts in a road, we default to live in alignment with our beliefs. So, it’s crucial you understand where your beliefs come from, what you believe, and how it’s impacting your life.

You have permission to believe anything you want. You also will continue to prove your beliefs true. This is the first of a two-part series to help you get rid of your limiting beliefs and decide on purpose what you want to believe. 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • What beliefs are and where they come from
  • Why you continue to prove your beliefs true
  • What are limiting beliefs
  • How to figure out what your limiting beliefs are

Mentioned on the show:

What to do when you just can’t take it anymore

I cried at work. In front of my manager. For a good 2 minutes. I was so tired, stressed, and overwhelmed and I just couldn’t hold it back any longer.

Did you know when you cry, your tears include a protein-based hormone that acts as a pin killer? It’s true. Crying is one of the ways your body tries to help you feel better and get back to “normal”.  

Learning how to feel is a crucial skill in learning how to live a full life and go after your dreams. In this episode you’ll learn how to feel all the stress, anxiety, and frustration that comes up. When you learn how to feel it, you are back in control and no longer trying to avoid feeling bad. Growth means getting through the hard things and hard things don’t always feel great. But when you know how to feel it, it’s so much easier than you think. It’s as easy as paying attention to different parts of your body and taking a few deep breaths.

Tune in this week and learn how to feel all the things that come up in living a full life. Remember, the goal is not to feel better. The goal is to feel.  

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • Why I cried at work
  • Where your feelings come from
  • How to feel your emotions
  • How to feel different emotions

Mentioned on the show:

  • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.
  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.

What to do when you’re tired if feeling bad

Most of us are tired of feeling anxious about the current political climate. We’re over the stress from always feeling behind at work. And throw on top of that a global pandemic. Sometimes we just want to feel better.

But here’s the secret. The goal is not to feel better. The goal is to feel.

Living a full life means it’s full of amazing adventures and tragic events. It has heartbreaking endings, and inspiring wins. As humans, we have a nature desire to grow and process, but if we don’t know how to deal with the crap along the way, we slow ourselves down.

Tune in this week for part 1 of this topic and learn what it means to not have the goal be to feel better. Learn why having the goal be to feel is how you feel better. And make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss part 2 where you will learn how to feel all that stress and overwhelm while still moving forward.   

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • Why the goal is not to just feel better.
  • The 3 reasons we want to feel bad.
  • Real life examples of where we want to feel vs. feel better.

Mentioned on the show:

  • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.
  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.

How to push back

Do you get frustrated when stakeholders keep slowing down your project because they push back on everything? Are you on the end of losing it because your leaders keep asking for random requests last minute?

This week I’m teaching you one of my most powerful and easiest tricks in the books. Using this tool will help you push back in a way that builds trust while maintaining balance.

The goal is to say yes and… When you do this, it shows you’re on their side, willing to help, and removes any resistance. It also opens a conversation to align on how you are prioritizing it or how you are going to approach it before you get started.

It’s a simple tool, but the application is endless.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • Why people get defensive when you push back
  • How to pushback without adding needed to work more hours
  • Why it’s so effective
  • How it works in real examples

Mentioned on the show:

Helpful vs hurtful pain

A few years ago, I got a call out of the blue telling me my position was being eliminated.

I was angry because how it went down was so not fair. I was also worried because I had just moved across the state with my family and did not want to have to find a new company to work for.

They say the only way past something is through, but how do you do that when what you are dealing with is really hard? This week you will learn how to do that.

Being mad and frustrated can be a healthy part of the process. You have to grieve and feel bad before you can feel better. But there’s a lot of negative emotion we feel that’s not helpful.

Healing pain helps you grow, focuses on the future and comes from love. Hurtful pain comes from fear and resentment about what happened. Learning to allow the healing pain and minimize the hurtful pain is how you get through it

Tune in this week and learn how to get through difficult situations without coming out if angry and doubting yourself. 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • What makes a negative emotion helpful and healing
  • What makes a negative emotion hurtful
  • How to deal with difficult situations without feeling more angry and down on yourself.

Mentioned on the show:

  • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.
  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.

Emotional exhaustion

Feeling tired because you worked hard, stayed on track, got lots of things done, and had fun along the way feels amazing. Feeling tired because you stressed and worried all day and feel like you are still behind is exhausting.

There are two main reasons we feel emotionally exhausted. The first is spending emotion energy wishing things were different. The second reason is we think things will be better when _____ (fill in the blank) changes.   

But this is the reason we feel exhausted is because of how you are thinking about your situation. This is great news because you can choose how to think about it, but listen and learn how to do it.  

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • Why you feel emotionally exhausted
  • How wishing things were different is a root cause of emotional exhaustion
  • How thinking things will get better when they are different is an emotionally exhausting trap
  • How to stop feeling so exhausted and move forward

Mentioned on the show:

Feeling nervous around senior leaders

Are you tired of feeling nervous around Senior leaders? You get that logically they have more years of experience and you are not expected to be as good as they are, but emotionally you just can’t get past it?

Good news. You’re human. But even better news, feeling nervous has nothing to do with how senior you or the other people are in the room. It has everything to do with how you are looking at it and what you are making it mean.

But everyone’s just making it up. Some have been doing it for more years than you, but everyone is making it up.

Tune in this week and learn how stop feeling so nervous around senior leaders.  

 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • Why we feel nervous
  • What we make it mean that others have more years of experience than we do
  • Why the number of years you’ve been in your position is not what’s making you feeling nervous
  • How to feel more confident

Mentioned on the show:

  • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.
  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.

What to do when you can’t keep up

Are you struggling to feel like you can keep up? Is your to do list growing and you feel like you can’t keep juggling it all?

When you are trying to juggle it all, you have to evaluate which things are rubber and which things are glass. You can let the rubber balls fall because they will bounce back up. Then you have time to focus on the glass ones.  

Even better, you can start evaluating everything on your plate and stop telling yourself you need to do it all. Learning to trust yourself, your relationships, and your past work makes it so much easier to stop trying to do it all.

Because, you can do anything, you just can’t do everything. Tune in this week and learn how to juggle it all.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • How to look at 5 areas of your life and decide which things you are willing to let drop and which things you want to focus on.
  • How to stop adding more to your plate so you don’t feel so overwhelmed.
  • How to trust yourself, your relationships, and your past work to be willing to step back when needed.

Mentioned on the show:

  • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.
  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.

Career Advice with Sr. Principle Engineer Luu Tran

When considering your career path, there are multiple ways to think about it. Individual contributor of management. Tech or none-tech. Big company or start up. The truth is, there’s no one path fits all.

In this episode Luu Tran, a Senior Principal Engineer, shares some of his career ups and downs and how to think about what you want. It’s important to not only know what your priorities are, but how to make decisions to make sure you are aligned with those priorities.  

When you keep the bigger picture in mind and what you real priorities are, making decisions about your career so much easier.

 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • The 3 part framework to consider when deciding on different career paths.
  • How to go from a manager back to an individual contributor
  • How to stop dreading your job and keep your priorities inline.

Mentioned on the show:

What are “dumb” questions and how to stop asking them

We ask ourselves questions all day long, but don’t even realize it.

  • Why can I get up earlier?
  • Why don’t they help with the laundry?
  • When is this going to be over?
  • Why am I the only one that cares?
  • Why can’t they figure it out?

The problem is, when you ask your brain a question, it hijacks whatever you are doing and focuses on answer it. But answering these types of questions just keeps you stuck and validates why it’s hard and should be different.

If you really want to change something, you need to start asking better questions that give you a better answer and move you forward.

Tune in this week and learn how to start asking better questions and to use the part of your brain that obsesses over answering questions to your advantage.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • What makes a question “dumb.”
  • What happens to your brain when you ask it questions.
  • The 2 biggest problems when asking “dumb” questions.
  • How to start asking better questions to reach your goals and make changes faster

Mentioned on the show:

  • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.
  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.