How to add more EQ to your IQ

EQ is your ability to understand and deal with the emotional side of life. Most of us have spent thousands of hours and even hundreds of thousands of dollars at school learning. But how much have you invested in learning, practicing, and applying knowledge around your emotional intelligence?  

Employees with a strong EQ don’t hate their careers. They don’t dread going to work in the morning and they are not constantly anxious about work. They make mistakes but learn and grow from them. They motivate people and have empathy and compassion along the way.

But learning how to add more EQ to your IQ is not something most of us are taught in school. This week, we are diving deep into the importance of emotional intelligence and how to grow your EQ right now.

 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • What EQ really is
  • Why having a strong and growing EQ is so important at work
  • How to use your feelings as a data point
  • How to grow your EQ today

Mentioned on the show:

  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.

The 3 critical mechanisms to actually reach your goals this year

What goals did you set last January? Are you on track to reach them? If you’re like most people, you’ve given up on some or all of them.

That’s because we set goals for things we want to start or stop doing. And it requires consistent daily changes. But most of us go about reaching our goals all wrong. And in this episode, you’re going to learn 3 things you can do right now to significantly increase your chances of reaching your goals.

We are great at coming up with excuses to why we can’t reach the goal or why it’s going to be hard. But let’s start admitting those excuses and coming up with a plan to overcome them.

Tune in this week and learn how to make a few small tweaks around how you start going after you goals. It’s going to make all the difference.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • Why most of us don’t end up reaching our goals
  • How to make reaching hard goals easier
  • The 3 critical elements to increase your chances of reaching your goals.
  • How to have fun along the way

Mentioned on the show:

    • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.
    • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.

Limiting beliefs

What do you believe about your past? What do you believe about your job?

A belief is a thought you’ve had so many times that it feels true. Like ruts in a road, we default to live in alignment with our beliefs. So, it’s crucial you understand where your beliefs come from, what you believe, and how it’s impacting your life.

You have permission to believe anything you want. You also will continue to prove your beliefs true. This is the first of a two-part series to help you get rid of your limiting beliefs and decide on purpose what you want to believe. 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • What beliefs are and where they come from
  • Why you continue to prove your beliefs true
  • What are limiting beliefs
  • How to figure out what your limiting beliefs are

Mentioned on the show:

What to do when you can’t keep up

Are you struggling to feel like you can keep up? Is your to do list growing and you feel like you can’t keep juggling it all?

When you are trying to juggle it all, you have to evaluate which things are rubber and which things are glass. You can let the rubber balls fall because they will bounce back up. Then you have time to focus on the glass ones.  

Even better, you can start evaluating everything on your plate and stop telling yourself you need to do it all. Learning to trust yourself, your relationships, and your past work makes it so much easier to stop trying to do it all.

Because, you can do anything, you just can’t do everything. Tune in this week and learn how to juggle it all.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • How to look at 5 areas of your life and decide which things you are willing to let drop and which things you want to focus on.
  • How to stop adding more to your plate so you don’t feel so overwhelmed.
  • How to trust yourself, your relationships, and your past work to be willing to step back when needed.

Mentioned on the show:

  • Get the How to confidently speak up in meetings free online course. In this 10 minute video training, you’re going to learn 3 ways to start speaking up today.
  • Ready to get some free 1:1 help? I offer a limited number of free coaching calls each week. Grab time on my calendar and let’s get you feeling more confident today.

Career Advice with Sr. Principle Engineer Luu Tran

When considering your career path, there are multiple ways to think about it. Individual contributor of management. Tech or none-tech. Big company or start up. The truth is, there’s no one path fits all.

In this episode Luu Tran, a Senior Principal Engineer, shares some of his career ups and downs and how to think about what you want. It’s important to not only know what your priorities are, but how to make decisions to make sure you are aligned with those priorities.  

When you keep the bigger picture in mind and what you real priorities are, making decisions about your career so much easier.

 

What you’ll learn in this episode:

  • The 3 part framework to consider when deciding on different career paths.
  • How to go from a manager back to an individual contributor
  • How to stop dreading your job and keep your priorities inline.

Mentioned on the show:

How to keep going when you’re not motivated

Everyone has those days when you are not feeling it, but what do you do when a day turns into months on end?

 

It’s so hard to keep working hard when your job is not motivating. But what do you do about it?

 

Phycologists call it the motivational triad. Your brain is wired to help you avoid danger, seek pleasure right now, and save energy. Understanding this and how to use it to help you is the secret to being more motivated.

 

In this week’s episode you will learn how to create more motivation and what to do when you’re not feeling it, especially when it comes to your job.

 

Who’s your mentor? Let me be your mentor and coach. I have just a few free calls left. Grab some time on my calendar and let’s come up with a plan to get you feeling more confident today.

How to feel better – Episode 2

Things have been crazy at work and a few weeks ago I cried in front of my manager in my one on one. I felt so much better about it after and teach you two reasons why.

A feeling is a chemical cascade cause by neurons connecting in your brain. Your emotions are coming from your thoughts which is great news because you can’t die from an emotion and you can learn how to manage your brain and decide where you want to focus.

In this week’s episode, you are going to learn two ways to start feeling better today. If you are feeling stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed about things, this episode will give you mechanisms to start feeling better and solve any problem you are dealing with.

If what you heard made sense to you and you want help applying it to your specific situation, grab some time on my calendar and let’s come up with a plan to get you feeling more confident today.

Data vs. Drama – Episode 1

You probably understand the importance of looking at the
data to understand how your business is preforming, but what if you applied
this same concept to yourself.

There’s data and there’s drama and we all try to focus on
changing the data, but it’s not that easy.

Data is facts and statistics collected together for
reference or analysis purposes. The drama comes into play when we interpret that
data.

In this week’s episode, you are going to learn how to start
understand that data and drama in your career so that you can become more aware
of what areas you can actually control Awareness is the first and most
important step to all the tools you will learn in this podcast, so be sure to
listen to this episode.

If what you heard made sense to you and you want help applying it to your specific situation, grab some time on my calendar and let’s come up with a plan to get you feeling more confident today.

Why you end up doing other people’s work

Nothing is more frustrating than feeling like you can’t do your job because someone else is not doing theirs.  It feels like you don’t have time to teach them or hold them accountable so often we just do it for them.

That’s fine in the moment, but it’s not possible to do everyone’s job and it’s just adding to your stress and overwhelm.

For example, maybe you’re responsible for your teams’ monthly business review and you need each leader to submit their updates. You probably sent out a schedule, gave directions on where to put the information and started working on your part. Chances are, someone missed the deadline and another person submitted it wrong. Or maybe someone submitted information that was confusing and missing data.

We end up spending time chasing things down, but at the end of the day we end up doing their work and fixing it. We are the ones responsible for pulling it all together so we don’t want to look bad.

This happening once or twice is fine, but when it’s constant and happening across multiple projects, it’s easy to quickly get overwhelmed and burnout.

No one wants to work when they feel like they can’t get ahead. It’s not motivating to work hard on projects when no one else seems to care about doing their part. It’s impossible to micro manage and double check every detail.

At some point, you have to hold others accountable to do their job so you can do yours. But how do you actually do that?

Instead of trying to tell them HOW to do it, you have to focus on the WHAT. What do you need from them in order to move the project forward. They get to figure out how to get it, but the more specific and clear you are on the what, the less time you will spend trying to tell them how to do it.

Now be warned this is easier said than done. People want the how. They want to know exactly how to do the thing you are asking so they don’t have to figure it out, but guess what. Our jobs are to figure out how.

So if you are feeling overwhelmed because you feel like you have to do everyone else’s work so you can do yours, focus on being more clear and direct with WHAT you need from them and encourage them to get creative on figuring out HOW to do that.

If you want help figuring out how to do this with your work, let’s jump on the phone and figure it out together. Grab time on my calendar to connect.

You got this.

LB

The secret to letting people judge you

One of the key elements to being confident is learning to let other people judge you because no matter what, they will.

What other people think about you is none of your business.

Some of my clients push back on this because they think it sounds aloof and arrogant, but that’s not what I’m saying.

It’s kind of like going paintballing. If you get hit in the leg it hurts. You will probably get a bruise and if you get hit enough times, you might need to sit out for a bit. But if you get hit in the chest where you have protective gear on, you notice the impact and feel it, but keep going. You make sure you aren’t hurt and go back to playing the game.

It is the same with people’s judgements of you. If you are not confident and lack the gear to have your own back, it’s going to hurt. What they think about you is going to impact you. You are going to take it all in and use it as evidence to believe your already crappy thoughts about yourself. If the judgment gets back enough, you might even bow out and stop trying.

But if you are confident and know how to trust yourself, they are still going to judge you. You’ll notice it, but it won’t leave a lasting bruise and stop you from moving forward. You get to decide if you want to take that judgement and learn something from it or leave it by the wayside because it’s not true. When you know how to trust yourself, you are all in the game, but fully prepared to keep moving forward no matter what others think.

What would you have done differently today if you were truly confident? What would you have said no to? What would you have said yes to? What would be different if you really knew how to trust yourself?

Learning how to let people judge you is one of the most liberating skills you can learn. If you want help figuring out how to do this with your specific situation, grab time on my calendar and let’s figure it out.

You got this.